How to Survive FEELING LONELY AND PATHETIC

You swear that your disgust at your roommates’ cute and cuddly relationship isn’t due to jealousy. But let’s be real—if you’re single and living with a couple, you can feel like you’re returning to home sweet hell pretty much every day.

It’s hard to NOT think about how pathetic and miserable you are when you’re constantly accompanied by those other significant others. Every walk to the subway station, every dinner, every “goodnight” is a reminder that they are two and you are one. And this is not a balanced ensemble.

Clearly all waiters and waitresses agree. “Will there be a fourth person joining you tonight?”

If you’re sick of your date being the coat chair, try to put a positive spin on it.

• You have infinitely more elbowroom at the table.
• You can eat as much garlic and onions as you want.
• You don’t have to share your meal… or dessert!
• You at least have the possibility of getting someone to buy you a drink.

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Just try not to let your loneliness take over your life...

How to Survive NAVIGATING PERSONAL BOUNDARIES

Living with a couple almost certainly means you will, at one point or another, walk in on a hot and heavy cuddling session on the couch. But remember, we’ve all been there. Don’t pretend you’ve never used that loveseat as a loveseat.

However, you do have the right to tell them it can’t get out of hand. It is perfectly reasonable to demand to see a bowl of ice cream every time you hear that Ready Whip can.

And you may find yourself needing to enforce a dress code. Sure, seeing The Girlfriend walk around without a shirt is no big deal, especially if, like me, she happens to be your sister. But is it fair that she’s the only one in this apartment who has the freedom to not care? You don’t even leave the shower without a full body robe on lest The Boyfriend is around. So why does she get to flaunt it? Setting clear boundaries is in everyone’s best interest.